Innuendo Game
by Takiri
Summary: Lavi knows something about Kanda and Allen that nobody else knows. What will he do about it? Yullen, character labeled Lavi instead of Allen because Lavi is the main character, not Allen. somewhat Yullen Week #4: Games standalone OR sequel to "Say Please.


**I have decided to leave "Say Please" at just the one chapter, but though this can be read as a standalone, it can also be read as a sequel. Thank you to SilentKiller1 for inspiring me to wonder how Lavi would react to "Say Please," and thank you to all of my wonderful reviewers!**

**I didn't write this specifically for Yullen Week and Lavi is actually the central character, but the plot seems nevertheless to fit with the theme, "Games." Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I can only wish I were brilliant enough to be the creator and owner of -Man and its characters.**

Lavi was on his way to the cafeteria when a group of Finders ran past him. He grabbed one by the shoulder.

"What's going on? Is the Order in danger?" he demanded.

"In a way. Kanda and Allen are fighting in the cafeteria. We're getting as far away as we can and so should you." The Finder broke away and took off after his companions.

Lavi raised an eyebrow. Yu-chan and Moyashi-chan fighting? That was what they were so worried about? As far as he was concerned, the fight taking place in the cafeteria simply meant dinner _and_ a show. He continued on his way in no hurry. It wasn't like a fight that had half the Order fleeing would be over any time soon.

Outside the cafeteria, Lavi could hear indications of a struggle. A loud scream that had to be from Allen almost forced him to cover his ears. Maybe the little guy actually needed some help. He opened the door, revealing a scene of destruction and…

Lavi froze, wide-eyed before he'd taken more than one step into the room. Did his eye deceive him, or was that Kanda on top of Allen… naked? The door swung back into place, its weight knocking Lavi on his ass where he remained in shock for a good minute.

After his surprise had more or less passed, Lavi stood up slowly. He did not want to be around when Kanda and Allen came out. Knowing Kanda, that would be fatal, especially since Lavi wouldn't be able to help but make witty remarks. No, he would save those for later when it wouldn't be so obvious that he knew for a fact what had just passed.

Lavi headed back to his room to scheme until opportune moments presented themselves.

* * *

As it happened, Komui had come up with the crazy idea of having the exorcists play some weird American game called baseball against the science department and a few other residents of Headquarters. Participation was not optional. Kanda was not happy.

Although several players suggested to Coach Komui that it was a bad idea to equip Kanda with a weapon when he was so clearly displeased, Komui made no exceptions. Soon the non-exorcist team had dwindled from twelve players to nine on account of some hard line drives by Kanda. As such, when it came time for this diminished team to bat, they had no designated hitter for their pitcher.

"Kanda!" yelled Komui from the dugout. "Since it's your fault their team doesn't have enough players now, you can be their designated hitter."

"No," replied Kanda sharply from center field, where it was thought he could do the least harm.

"Oh come on, Yu-chan!" complained Lavi. "You can bat for both sides, can't you?"

A shocked expression followed by a piercing glare let Lavi know that his double entendre had not gone unnoticed. "Baka Usagi, maybe I'll hit a line drive at you this time. Third base isn't such a hard target."

"Yeah, I'll bet you get there fast," joked Lavi.

Kanda began stalking over to the red-head with murder in his eyes. Komui dashed out to intercept the exorcist.

"There, there. See now, Kanda, that wasn't so hard." The chief pulled Kanda away to get a bat and helmet.

Kanda stepped up to the plate left-handed to get a better shot along the third baseline.

"What do you know, you swing both ways, too!" goaded Lavi.

Lenalee pitched the ball straight into the strike zone. Kanda swung, knocking the ball away with a solid crack. He took off towards first base and was going to continue to second when laughter reached him. Stopping, he looked at Lavi, who was sprawled on the ground.

"You're out, Yu-chan. I caught it. But then, you're good at making people catch things, aren't you?"

Too angry for words, Kanda would have attacked Lavi had their first baseman, Marie, not held him back. After struggling loudly for a while, Kanda stopped.

"Let me go. Don't worry, I'll kill him later, not right now. Might as well get this stupid game over with."

The science department's next batter hit the ball to center field where Kanda fielded it, then threw it to first for the out.

"Nice throw, Yu-chan!" yelled Lavi. "Maybe you should be pitching." Kanda's knuckles turned white from clenching his fists, just managing to maintain control. Meanwhile Allen turned rather red from where he was crouched in front of the umpire. "Hey, Allen! You wouldn't be too scared to catch for Kanda, right? I mean, he would be pitching pretty hard, harder than Lenalee at least, but I'll bet you can handle it."

Kanda took an angry step towards third. A yell from Komui caught his attention.

"Kanda!"

"What?" he snarled.

"Ehm…" Komui consulted with Reever for a few seconds while Kanda waited impatiently. He was just about to resume walking when Komui spoke again. "I just remembered, Bak-chan asked me to have to pay him a visit at the Asian branch. I think now would be a good time for that, don't you?"

"…Che, whatever." Kanda left the field. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, particularly Lavi.

A few nearby players heard Komui mutter to Reever, "Quick, call Bak-chan and tell him to expect company. Tell him he has five minutes to come up with a reason for needing to see Kanda or we're all dead."

* * *

After the game, Lavi felt hungry so he headed to the cafeteria. Allen, of course, was way ahead of him. Allen had left immediately, before the halls could get crowded. Lavi, however, had to choose between shoving through the throngs or taking the long way.

He chose the long way.

A few corridors down, Lavi happened upon a scene that made him wish he had taken the crowded path.

There in front of him was Kanda pinning Allen to the wall, but rather than trying to strangle the smaller exorcist, he was doing something else that left them both short of breath. Lavi could do nothing but stare as Kanda's tongue dipped into Allen's mouth, caressed his lips, and danced with his tongue. The Japanese exorcist's hands gripped Allen tightly, so tightly that he should have been in pain, and yet the only noises that Lavi's little Moyashi-chan was making were of delight. His own hands only pulled distant Yu-chan closer, knotting in his hair and trailing along his waist, all the way down to his hips, which occasionally made slight movements with Allen's.

Allen's eyes slid open just enough to watch Kanda for a moment, but Lavi's hair was bright enough to catch his attention, even as distracted as he was. Allen stiffened. Kanda opened his eyes to see what was wrong, making a small noise of complaint until he saw what, or rather who, his Moyashi was looking at.

Then he made a rather louder noise of anger, tearing himself away from Allen to pin Lavi to the wall instead, one hand around his throat, the other resting on Mugen.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing Baka Usagi? Do you know how much I've wanted to kill you today and how much harder you're making it for me to let you live?"

Lavi gulped and said the first thing that came to mind, given his disposition to tease and taunt. "And here I was thinking only Allen made anything harder for you."

In the next moment, that very Allen became the only thing preventing Kanda from drawing Mugen and slicing the redhead to ribbons. And it was a very difficult task to pin Kanda's arm to his side.

"Kanda, please. I'm sure Lavi can refrain from telling everyone about us. If he did, that would make things difficult for us and he's our friend so he wouldn't do that." Allen's look at Lavi was unusually pointed, though with reason.

Kanda snorted. "Unless he's disgusted by us. You saw the look on his face. Now release my arm."

"No. I'm sure… I'm sure it's alright." Allen turned to Lavi. "What… what do you think of us? Of me and Kanda being… together?"

Before he could stop himself, Lavi smirked and exclaimed, "Strike!"

Kanda and Allen blanched. Allen actually regained his composure first.

"Lavi, please, this is no time to be joking around."

Then Kanda relaxed. "No, let it be, Moyashi. What did you say Baka Usagi?"

Lavi repeated himself nervously. "Strike."

"Now, say it one more time."

"Strike?"

Kanda grinned maliciously and used the hand that had been around Lavi's throat to knock him unconscious. "Three strikes, you're out!"

Allen was dumbstruck. "I cannot believe you just did that."

"What? Knocked him out?"

"No. Made a baseball joke."

Irritated by this observation, Kanda did the one thing he knew would shut the Moyashi up for sure. Took Allen to first base.

**Thus ends my second fanfiction. I hope it amused and made you happy. If it did and you want to repay the favor, reviews make me happy!**


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